The Hedgehog Fiasco

Now this little fiasco is nothing to do with the fact that the stuffed animal below is a badger. My eldest calls it Hedgehog and it is one of her most beloved toys. Many an evening has been spent looking for this little bugger before the girls will go to bed. 

His small size and subtle camouflage make him perfect at hiding in the messy jungle that is our living room. His frequent hiding places include toy handbags, pushchairs, behind cushions on the sofa , inside shoes. Anywhere to keep us guessing (and swearing) really. 

The one and only "Hedgehog" 

 His little tricks did go up a notch somewhat the day we got back from holiday. 

That night we put the girls to bed and had to say that Hedgehog was playing hide and seek and they could play to find him in the morning. That bought us a little more time. We came down and went through all our luggage, checked the car, anywhere we could think of. 

We both fell into the sofa and looked at each other. 

Hedgehog was gone.

On the way back from holiday we'd stopped at a big stately home for a picnic, it was the last time either of us could remember seeing him, he must have fell out of the car.

Now I'm not one to anthropomorphize stuffed objects but I did feel a little sorry for the furry little guy that night, lay in a field somewhere, but I also felt a little bit crap as a father knowing my little girl was going to be so upset the next day.

I hatched a plan. 

We brought Hedgehog from a National Trust property a year or so ago. That next morning I rang round a few local National Trust properties and found one that had a toy Hedgehog badger that matched Hedgehogs description. 

As soon as they opened I was off. Within an hour I was back with a much fluffier version of the toy we all loved. I even kept him in the footwell of the car and kicked him round a bit to dirty him up. 

I then loaded the washing machine and chucked Hedgehog The Second in with it. I called my daughter over to help me get the washing out. 

She found him. 

She looked at him, saying nothing.

Then looked at us.
Seconds ticked by.
She looked back at Hedgehog.
Had we been rumbled?

"Hedgehog got fat." She  finally said

"He's just fluffy from hiding in the washing machine" I said "Silly Hedgehog"

"Yeah, silly Hedgehog" replied my eldest. "Tonight I won't cuddle him, I'll sleep on him to make him thin again"

I slept contented that night that I'd been a good dad and kept my girl happy. 

The imposter 

The next day at work my wife text me.

" Just been presented with a skinny Hedgehog "Look mummy, he's all skinny again!" Don't know where she found him. Little £$%£!"

Guess we hadn't lost him after all.

Bugger.